The Aioue LiveJournal

I haven't updated my deviantART page in over two years and I come to find that the last journal entry was about me being cold and referencing a crappy old radio show that nobody listens to. Despite that, for unknown reasons, I visit deviantART every day so if you thought I vanished and went elsewhere in the infinite squalor called the internet, you're wrong. But since this entry is about deviantART, you might be wondering why I don't post there, well there are actually three reasons why I'm updating to my LiveJournal and not on my deviantART page.

Firstly, I'm not keen on being banned for some extraneously superfluous reason just because I hurt the feelings of some mentally deficient manchild.

Secondly, Since I apparently update annually, I figured that if I write an extra post here then I don't have to write squat until 2011.

Thirdly, the day may still come when the repertoire of internet comedy expands it's shelf space after the over-saturation of ninjas, pirates, and pictures of cats requesting fast food to include obscure radio show references and bears. And my last deviantART entry will stand among all others as being the Jesus of bear humour.

So after that, time to get to the main topic at hand: Some Brazilian artist, who's English skills are incredible if you took a Russian kid's basic English paper, ran it through every language in babelfish, then tried to imagine what the end result might sound like to a pidgeon, ended up getting banned on deviantART for this:

"Several year history of the submission of underage character erotica; the sale of this same erotica and other pornographic imagery though the use of publicly posted journals; sponsoring contests which encourage other deviants to produce erotica featuring underage characters."

So basically, he draws sexual pictures of characters from children's cartoons shows so grown men can masturbate to them. This is confounding. I'll admit that I'm a grown adult who watches The Disney Channel from time to time to see Donald Duck rage while Mickey sings a song about sharing or some gay shit like that, but to consider sexual scenarios on these characters is nothing short of fucking nuts.

But alas, this event served as a useful tool for a college project I have to work on that tries to analyze fandom and the internet communities that encompass them. From studying various forums and their denizens for the better part of about twenty minutes in a two day span (the extended editions of the lord of the rings won't watch themselves, you know), I've since learned that people involved in fandom generally comprise of intellectually destitute people who simply "circlejerk" one another in their respective communities and will valiantly fend off any trouble from outside sources, even if the source is a well-meaning one such as an individual simply giving constructive criticism.

And this is exactly why I decided to post this, because the communities the banned guy belongs to are the most mind-boggling because they really aren't the brightest people in the world and I find it really odd that they appear to have their general online social life seemingly justified by a crudely drawn character from a cartoon program aimed at children aged 6-11. But that's not even the gist of it, apparently a lot of them watch cartoons not to enjoy them, but to enjoy the sexual possibilities with these characters. Take the banned guy for instance, he was overtly obsessed with the robot girl from "My Life As A Teenage Robot" but more so than any average person, his obsession with her seriously made me think that he pretended to have sex with her every night by fucking a toaster.

So imagine their surprise when one of their own gets banned from a website, all of a sudden the aforementioned circlejerking commences and they all get in a huff trying to valiantly defend a guy that most likely molests his vacuum cleaner, even going to the point of saying that he didn't do any of the things deviantART accused him of. Hold on there! Let's not get too stupid! I can confirm two offenses twice! "What?! Where!" you scream at me and point like you're Phoenix Wright, "This is trivial shit, why should we care?!" The lone internet ranger says in the back. Well if there's anything people on the internet love, it's trivial shit. Why else did one time the "Knight" article on Wikipedia was just a small blurb while the section on "Jedi Knight" was so extensive that were it a book, it'd be even longer than War and Peace?

The instances I'm talking about is when his egomaniacal dickery got the best of them and decided that he should sell his "artwork" and I mean those quotations because I don't consider him to be that great an artist, he can draw sure but his skill is vastly inferior to so many others on dA that I've come to enjoy. But anyway, he used deviantART journals to solicit money from people for erotic sketches of copyrighted characters and thus profited from the intellectual properties of others. If there was any major reason why he deserved a ticket to Bantown, that right there is it. But that still doesn't stop his circlejerk buddies from defending him from an imaginary injustice nonetheless, did I mention they masturbate to children's cartoons?

All in all, I feel the little robot-molesting guy deserved the ban, especially since he sold sketches, fucking sketches, where other people offered fully painted works for free. But not just any crappy sketches, sketches of cartoon kids fucking. As I said before, he's not that good of an artist to be able to get away with that, no matter what the content is, but I guess all you can really blame is the egocentric nature of a mentally handicapped perverted artist who spends his days watching crudely drawn cartoons and imagining sexual scenarios of animated children until the day comes where he's hung himself by the doorknob of his parents' basement with his pants to his ankles, holding a sketchbook with a Hello Kitty sticker on it. A sad portrayal of Romeo & Juliet, when will the day come when a man can live in harmony with the love of his life, a young cartoon robot, to cherish in matrimony happily ever after until death do they part? Hopefully never as far as reality is concerned. Dumbasses.

"In my defense, that koala was being kind of a dick."

In the early 90's, when I was naught but a young lad in ye olden tymes where wearing whatever was at the bottom of their laundry hampers and lack of personal hygiene was but a strong fashion trend. Where something could indeed "smell like teen spirit", it was then when I had acquired thine very own personal computation device. Oh how art thou computation device, of thy two hundred megahertz worth of processing power, and thine graphics card that can display upwards of sixteen colours! And a sound card that could accomplish such marvelously realistic beeps and boop sounds. I had spent many a day in my renaissance youth that drove thy mother and thy father "fucking insane" as they hath once spake.

'Twas a dazzling device to be sure.

Come 2004, this computer totally fucking sucks and thees, thous, and thys are really stupid now and just makes people want to be near you less. How in god's name my computer managed to last this long is a question that confounded every professor, doctor, and the cat that slept on the tower and shed all over the fucking keyboard. While the rest of the world was happily killing demons in the sparkling new Doom 3, I had a piece of digital dog shit that had trouble running regular Doom. It was also completely incompatible with every new piece of equipment like keyboards and mice with obsolete ports that just made the clerk at the counter roar in unmitigated, lung crushing laughter. Not to mention that it was completely virus infested, the day it finally succumbed to the virtual cancers of malware, adware, spyware, and any other kind of "ware", finally brought to light the need for a new computer.

Behold! My 2.6GHz computer with a 40GB hard drive, 256 GB of RAM, and a sound card that doesn't suck at playing MIDIs or actual music with guitars and stuff! After about a year, I decided to upgrade the sucker with extra RAM and a new graphics card.

It's an awesome device to be sure.

Four years later. My computer is a pile of crap. I can't run any new games on it like Mirror's Edge, Left 4 Dead, or even run Doom 3 at high quality, this thing still has a goddamned floppy disk. What modern computer these days still have those?! Why can't I fucking win with this?! At least it ain't all bad, almost a year ago, I bought a my often dreamed of "Media Drive" to store a ton of games, movies, tv shows, and whatever I could think of (mainly porn), and boy did I fill that sucker up with all kinds of useless junk.

One year after buying it. My new hard drive is fucking dying.

After a way too long introduction and a poorly executed running timeline joke, I decided last year to get what I've been thinking as "the last upgrade" for my current computer and bought a Western Digital 320GB hard drive to store a vast collection of music, videos, and whatever else I can of. Recognizing that my current 2004 hard drive is running smoothly to this day, I figured that this new one will last long enough for me to eventually get a better computer in the next few years. Cue me completely wrong.

After less than a year of buying the sucker, it's now going crazy on me. What CHKDSK could find before completely freezing for some reason uncovered three sets of bad clusters. Trying to listen to any music on it makes things skip, videos do the same, trying to download something onto it makes the CPU go haywire and slows everything to a crawl. Defragging is out of the question too as it freezes up like CHKDSK does. And here I am with no idea how to fix it.

I don't even know what to do, I thought about formatting it hoping that fixes everything, but that would mean losing 200 gigs of data because I have very limited means of backing stuff up. The only other solution I have thus far is simply backing up what I can to the main drive and then disabling it until I can either buy a new computer or buy a replacement hard drive.

Having to do that doesn't bother me that much really, money isn't exactly an issue to me. The issue is that a five year old hard drive and a fourteen year old hard drive both managed to outlast a sleek new one, and both of those old drive came from their respective computers. Granted, I did download like a crazy bastard day in and day out, but I did that with the other two hard drives prior to the new one and both are still kicking today, so there's really no excuse for it, it should've lasted longer than it did.

Now I'm left asking that if I disable it until I can get a replacement. What on it do I back up to the main drive in the mean time? This annoys me. I bought that hard drive so I shouldn't have to ask myself what ought to be raping the limited space.

Fuck you Western Digital for making shitty hard drives that fail after less than a year. But since my older drives are still going strong. I guess they just don't make them like they used to?

"Professionals have standards. Be polite. Be efficient. Have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

Also, my newly refined journalistic skills have finally enabled me to write stupid puns in the entry titles.

If you're not aware, the new Ace Attorney game came out yesterday. This means awesome news for me as I've been a big fan of the series since Trials & Tribulations. Despite that I found the only case in the first three to actually use the magical features of DS to be boring as all hell, I was still stoked to rotate evidence around and around with my little plastic pen thing and scream objections into the microphone, much to the fear and dismay of everyone within earshot.

Obviously enough, it's no surprise that I went out on an adventure to find and buy the new Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney. I'm glad to say that I've gotten it, but it took a massive corporate network of employed stupidity to obtain it.

The very first place I decided to go was to my mall. Since I haven't been there for roughly two years, I figured I should go to EB Games (an actually good EB Games) to get my game and check out all the new stores while I was at it (We have a Hot Topic now and it won't stop playing HIM).

However, checking the mall for it became a nightmare to behold for my favorite hobby. EB Games bit the big one and it's been replaced by a GameStop, now there are two of these monstrosities in the same damn area. It's barely even past the food court, it's like having a Starbucks across from another Starbucks and that's now the best analogy I have for GameStop: It's like the Starbucks of videogames; All over the place and everybody hates it.

Checking both GameStops for Apollo Justice met with disappointment. The clerks at both stores told me that the game would not come in until tomorrow because according to them, and both of them said this near verbatim:

"The release date is like, when we kinda order the shipment, and then it sorta comes in the next day."

And then they asked if I wanted to pre-order it.... on the day it's supposed to come out. Needless to say, I went somewhere else and found it.

Having this come from both GameStops made me think to myself that only GameStop could get a game in late, and then think that the release date is the day that they can order a shipment if, you know, they feel like it. I haven't really been to a GameStop or any game store for that matter in a good while but I'm still pretty sure that a release date is the date a product is available in stores, not when a store orders them.

To GameStop's defense, I just read earlier this morning that some stores wouldn't get it until today. But to it's offense, is it really any wonder that GameStop would have gotten their shipment a day late? Not to mention that how the clerks' responded to my question suggested that they do it with every game. They basically told me that they get every game a day late. If that's true, What happened to their original motto of getting games ahead of every other store? And how on Earth has GameStop prospered to this degree? I still find it unbelievable that they asked if I wanted to pre-order a game that got released the same day they asked me to pre-order, it defies the laws of "pre". When I got the game, I really should've went back with it and told them to stuff their pre-orders down their throats.

Oh, if you're wondering how the new Ace Attorney game is, it's like how the fifth case was in the first Phoenix Wright game along with a complete graphical overhaul. The courtroom is completely diffrent (and yet the Judge somehow remains the same), my only real gripe is that it seems a little bit tougher now, I'm on the first case and I'm already a little stuck. There's also a new thing called the Percieve System that I still have absolutely no clue on how it works. Who cares though, this game is fun so far, and I'm playing it through to the end.

"OBJECTION!"

If you're reading this, you are on the internet, home to the many strange, wonderous, and often sick and shitty things on it. From beastiality, pedophilia, to even a man stretching his ass out or porn with women who shit into each others assholes, shit it back out, then eat it. With all this, I wonder how the fuck we all stand it. I like to see the internet as a tool to desensitize us to all the insanity of the world, turning us into bitter human beings who would heave a child into the path of a Nambla mob for no reason. But there is one thing all of us will forever be taken aback by, something so staggering, none of us are or will ever be able to comprehend it's stupid: The defective human.


One of the unfortunate folks I have on my MSN list is a guy with an amazing amount of issues, he has claimed that he has autism or retarded (though they go hand in hand) but then part of a secret government experiment or something equally unbeliveable. Personally, I feel he simply acts that way just to get attention, sorta like an emo that mentally slits his brain. My friend featured in this chatlog also agrees with that statement. However, if there's anything wrong with him, it's that he's a little obsessed with cartoon women. If I recall, he thinks he's married to Ami and Yumi of Puffy AmiYumi, but not the singers, the cartoon characters. Yeah...

( Read more... )

"I'm not a retard, I'm a mentally impaired genius!"

Depression will not let up until I bid goodbye to everyone and basically leave behind all the stuff I went and did for 18 months.

The fun part of it all is damn blocks, I haven't drawn a single thing worth a damn for months, and the only feasible thing I had going was writing. Now I can't do that either. For the icing on the cake, my head hurts like Fran Drescher teleported into my frontal lobe and won't stop laughing like a goat huffed up on helium.

Yes, I have a mental block on any and every possible artistic aspect that I am somewhat good at. When you try to do the only hobbies you like aside from shooting at cats with slingshots, only to fail horribly at it, bad things start to happen to you. You begin to think pirates are out to get you, but you just can't write it down for some reason. I can't exactly explain it, I can't explain how I just managed to write about the pirate incident, I was trying to do that for weeks!

Aside from all that, my head hurts, I can no longer be funny if I was that at any given point, so it's time to close it all down. Go back into hibernation like a bear, ignoring the irony that it's winter now, until I can start thinking stupid stuff for people to laugh at once again. Maybe that'll be weeks, or maybe in 18 months again? I really don't know, there hasn't been any advancement in time travelling technology unless you count the time Captain America was frozen in ice for 30 years, then cryogenics just may be the answer. Want to see the future? Get stuck in a glacier!

That's all, I'm tired, I'm going to bed. I just watched Sharkboy and Lavagirl so that may be the case of the headache. I believe it is because even Tylenol didn't suffice to ease the hurt. That means that the cranial pain will not suffice until I take a hatchet to my skull in hopes of hitting the part where I still remember that awful movie. Sure, I'll have a concussion and a kind of headache I'll not say because of the obvious pun factor, but I'll be rid of that crappy movie. Can you believe the director of Sharkboy did Sin City? It's the same vein as Halle Berry getting a razzie for Catwoman and an oscar for Monster's Ball. The simple equivalent of sucking and rocking at the same time.

Bye Bye to all, remember; An apple a day keeps the rapists away... or was it dentists? Oh well, doesn't matter a whole lot since you won't be seeing me around again. Thanks to everyone who was a great friend to me when I had some tough times, and I guess that's about it. Goodbye.

"Booyaka?"